Overcoming the Stigma: Embracing Your Past as a Part of Your Growth Journey.
We all have a past. For some, it’s filled with moments of joy, while for others, it’s dotted with hardships, struggles, and mistakes. Many people feel weighed down by the stigma attached to their past, especially if that past includes challenges like trauma, mental health struggles, or choices that didn’t lead to positive outcomes. But here’s a powerful truth: our past doesn’t define us—it’s part of our story, yes, but it’s also what shapes our growth, resilience, and wisdom.
I remember when I told people that I would be retiring from adult entertainment to become a journalist. People looked at Me as if it weren't possible. I had so many people tell Me that without showing My body, I had nothing to offer the world. I was called names that I won't repeat. For a while, I was discouraged, I believed their lies; I almost let strangers keep Me from creating the life I desired and deserved.
Thankfully, I was able to harness the power of My intellect and couple it with My brash, no nonsense demeanor and prove them wrong. Within a year, I was a paid blogger, writing for multiple urban magazines and getting press passes to events and interviewing celebrities. Accomplishing that first transition made it more comfortable for Me to make the leap from journalist to published author, life transition coach and notable speaker and advocate. If I can go from porn to purpose,, any transition is possible.
Embracing the past can be a turning point, allowing us to reclaim our lives and create a new, empowered self. Here’s how to begin embracing your past and forging a journey toward self-discovery and self-acceptance.
Shift the Narrative: Your Past as a Teacher, Not a Judge
One of the first steps in embracing your past is to recognize it as a part of your growth journey. Rather than seeing it as a series of events to be ashamed of, try to reframe it as a source of valuable lessons. Each struggle, failure, or misstep teaches us something. Maybe it showed you your resilience, helped you build compassion, or gave you a deeper understanding of others. When you allow yourself to see your past as a teacher, it no longer has the power to define or limit you—it becomes a tool for self-awareness and growth. My past and constant growth and transition, has helped Me guide so many others to their next level.
Practice Radical Self-Compassion
The process of accepting our past requires compassion. We often judge ourselves more harshly than we would judge anyone else. Practicing radical self-compassion means looking at your past self with the same understanding and forgiveness you would extend to a close friend. Self-compassion isn’t about ignoring mistakes or pretending they didn’t happen; it’s about recognizing that everyone makes them and that they’re part of being human. By treating yourself with kindness, you create a foundation for healing and allow yourself to move forward without shame.
Set New Goals and Take Intentional Steps Forward
Embracing the past doesn’t mean getting stuck in it. It’s important to set new goals that reflect who you want to be now. These goals can be simple or ambitious, but they should be meaningful and represent the new life you want to create. Start by identifying what you want for yourself, then, break these goals into small, manageable steps, and make progress each day. Even tiny steps can create big changes over time, helping you reclaim a sense of purpose and self-worth.
Build Positive, Supportive Relationships
Surrounding yourself with people who support and understand your growth journey can be transformational. Seek out friends, mentors, or coaches who encourage you and offer a safe space to express your thoughts and experiences. Supportive relationships create a network of strength around you, helping you build confidence and reinforcing your sense of worth. When you have people cheering you on, it’s easier to leave behind the stigma of the past and focus on the future.
Embrace a Daily Practice of Self-Reflection
Journaling, meditating, or practicing mindfulness can be powerful tools in learning to accept your past. Spend a few minutes each day reflecting on what you’ve learned, what you’re grateful for, and what you’re hoping to achieve. Regular self-reflection keeps you grounded and provides a chance to celebrate small victories. Journaling can be especially helpful in tracking your growth, allowing you to look back over time and see just how far you’ve come.
Lately, I've been vlogging daily and it's been giving Me great insight int My life, the changes I currently need to make and My goals.
Take Back Control by Releasing What Doesn’t Serve You
Part of taking your life back is learning to let go. This may mean releasing toxic relationships, beliefs, or even certain habits that no longer serve you. If there are parts of your life still tethered to your past in a negative way, ask yourself how you might let them go. Embracing a new path often requires clearing out the old to make space for something better. This has been the hardest part for Me, when you feel like you have so little, it's not always easy to let go, even if you know something no longer serves you. I tend to hold on to things and people too long, which can create it's own problems.
Remember, your past is only one chapter of a much larger story, and every day, you have the power to write a new page. By embracing your past with kindness, setting intentional goals, and focusing on your growth, you create a life where you’re not defined by past experiences but rather by the strength, resilience, and wisdom you’ve gained from them.
If you’re ready to make a real transformation and start embracing your true self, I invite you to join our Rediscover the You Within 5-Week Coaching Program starting later this month This journey will provide you with tools, insights, and support to explore your past, embrace it, and move forward with renewed purpose. Don't find yourself starting 2025 saying "new year, new Me" without doing the work. In 5 weeks, you can create a new you. Together, let’s create the life you desire and deserve, no matter the life you were given.
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